I have finally found the cause of the relentless chronic pain and fatigue I have experienced since July of 2009. Lyme Disease.
The first major flareup for me came days after I gave birth to my son who is now 18 months old. The pain was new and hitting 10 in intensity. Once I started on a medication regime, things calmed down. I remember feeling like I wanted to die because it was worst imaginable and in addition, I had a newborn at home. My sister came to stay with me because I could barely hold a fork. The best you can do right now is to ask for help, and believe me, that is more difficult than the pain itself. You also have to be patient - there will good days and bad days. Your life will definately never be normal again, but it does not mean you don't have a life. You have so many people depending on you to be strong. I have learned that I set an example for my children and it is for them I fight. This flare-up is the worst you will have, and once you on a regular medication regime, things will calm down so just hang in there. I know it is not easy and if you just need someone to talk to, please feel free to contact me. There are so many RA bloggers that know exactly what you are feeling and they are kind and caring and they would all be glad to help you get through this.
Pain like this is overwhelming. Most of us who have RA have, at one time or another, experienced the level of pain you're experiencing now. I know that there's little consolation in it, but remember that this pain DOES pass after a while. Keep taking the meds you've been prescribed, but also remember to drink a lot of water and eat carefully with good nutrition at the top of your list. Lots of good protein. Lots of green, leafy veggies. Whole grains to keep your GI tract moving even if YOU aren't, much, and to keep your glucose levels steady so your body is getting the burnable energy it needs to fight the pain and inflammation. Try to take a long, hot bath to help relax tense muscles, and do what you can to self-distract your mind from the pain -- read, watch movies (comedies are great because laughter releases endorphins, and you can use all the help you can get right now!). Breathe deeply -- breathe mindfully. And even when it's very bad, remind yourself of the daily gifts life offers despite pain and malaise. A singing bird, a perfect orange, the warmth of an electric blanket, a moon breaking through clouds. Your pain WILL ease and you'll feel like living again. Be gentle with yourself, and don't be afraid or ashamed to ask for help.Thinking of you,Wren
I know what you are going through, I have been there and no ... it is not fun.I had pain come and go off and on for 4 years. When I was finally properly diagnosed with RA, I was at a low point. My hands and feet already had serious damage, joints were swollen and hot and I could barely walk. I thought my life was over. Even after starting on MTX and Enbrel, I was in a consistent pain ranging from 5-9 for 2 months. I literally prayed to die, I was hurting so bad. Then I noticed the meds starting to make a difference, small at first but when you're hurting this bad, any relief is welcomed. Within 4 months after starting the MTX and Enbrel I was feeling better. With my RA, I will never have my old life back again, I know this and have accepted it. Your life changes, but it is not over.
ugh. just saw your blog through wren's post. i know this sucks, and all i can say is that eventually it will improve!! i have RA and have been in great shape for 4 years but it just came back in my neck ans ankle, and it knocked me on my a$$ for a while. i have the perspective to know it WILL improve, but not the patience to deal with not knowing when. good luck! and hopefully having a diagnosis will help get the right meds...i LOVE my meds.