Thursday, August 11, 2011
Today Almost Pushed Me overt the limit
I woke up in terrible pain today. Knees, elbows, toes. Later when the migraine hit, it really knocked me to the ground. I had to go take a rest and I was just quietly moaning for help. It was so painful.
I'm really embarrassed, but I keep hearing what sounds an older radio show with two men talking away. It's quit scary. I am losing my friggin mind. My temper is out of control. I need help. I need support. I fear I may take my life. I need a friend. I need prayer. Please.
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Please, please, PLEASE call your doctor(s) and do it ASAP! You should not have to suffer this way and they need to get into action and NOW. And do know you are not alone in this...never...EVER are you alone. I am sending out tons of prayers for you and will continue to keep you on my prayer list. But above all...CALL...reach out and ask for that help. (((HUGS)))
ReplyDeleteI beg of you to either call your doctor, call your clergy or a good friend. Call a hotline, call a stranger (i'll volunteer) or grab your children and hug them. BUT DON'T do what can not be undone... please.
ReplyDeleteI suffered for 10 straight years. Yes there were days I didn't think I could hold on. Then I thought about who would miss me the most and it kept me going just one more day.
Do you have any support?? If not, reach out to someone please. We may not know you physically but we do know part of you virtually.... you would be missed. HUGS.... Tammy
Hey honey!! Poor you! I know the feeling of being in pain, Dr looking at you like your koo-koo, etc. Hang in there change doctors insist on quality care. It took me 3 yrs to be diagnosed with RA. Now I wish they'd stop diagnosing me with stuff LOL! Now I have RA, episcleritis, Polycystic ovary syndrome, sleep apnea, and my newest flare is in my back with possibly Anklyosing Spondylitis....meh! I know you are tired of being in pain, but eventually they will find the right drugs for your RA and insist on changing your biologic if you don't feel thaty the one you are on is working. Always try and get your appointments first thing in the morning! Doctors look at you longer. If you need a friend I'm on facebook and on some great support groups...they do help keep you sane!!
ReplyDeleteBeth Anne, I am sending you an email. Sending you hugs and compassion your way.
ReplyDeleteThings can at times get overwhelming, and feel like too much - but you've already taken a step in the right direction, which is to ask for help.
ReplyDeleteI'm sending you my prayers right now. If there is anything else I can do to help, please let me know.
Sending loving hugs your way.
I don't know you. But you are definitely not alone! I was diagnosed with seronegative RA officially August 31st 2009. That day changed my life forever. But the good news is it does get better with friends. Would love for you to maybe check out www.rawarrior.com So much information you may find good answers. We will support you, comfort you, cry with you, laugh with you, and last but certainly not least we will stand up and fight back with you!!!
ReplyDeleteSaying prayers but please call your doctor or a friend who will come and sit with you. RA is totally overwhelming at times but know you aren't in this alone.
ReplyDeleteYou are NOT alone. Contact ANYONE. But especially your doctors, they CAN help, unfortuantely it does take some time. Please just contact anyone. We're all here for you, even if we don't know you.
ReplyDeleteI know what it feels like. I have been there and please call out to someone and let them know. I have been sick for more than 3 years and every day is different, there is hope and there is relief.
ReplyDeleteThere are times when we need to cry for help especially when in physical pain. When it looks like the end of the rope I always seem to find there is more to hang on to! Give yourself what you need right now to feel better. There is hope, there is love and there is a new day tomorrow.
Hang in there!!! Yes, it gets very overwhelming but you are strong! Please reach out to someone...
ReplyDeleteI hope you are feeling better. You are not alone.
ReplyDeletehold one. really hold on and fight. if you need to go to the ER. tomorrow marks the one year anniversary of a loved one's suicide. so many of us hurt and grieve so deeply. it may feel like an escape but you will find relief. i have been there and i am so happy that i was not successful in ending my life. the devastation to my family and friends wpoould have been far worse than the pain i was in. please hold on.
ReplyDeleteBeth, please know that you are not alone. You have asked for help. Please let your family or a friend know what is going on (if you haven't already) and tell them that you should not be alone right now. You are a beautiful person and a talented photographer with a family that needs you. You are in chronic pain, but the emotional pain will pass. I promise you. I have been there. It comes and it goes...it will go. It will get better. Sending prayers and ((hugs)).
ReplyDeleteBeth I AM HERE FOR YOU! I have suffured many years with depression and suicide. It is a very scary place to be. I am willing to chat privatily with you ANYTIME! I can promise you that one day it will get better, we may have pain (phyiscally) for the rest of our lives, but the Deep bottomless depression can and will leave. Please let me knnow if you would like to chat...jillandtrey@comcast.net Sending GIANT hugs!
ReplyDeleteHave your doctors tested you for behcets?
ReplyDeletehttp://www.behcets.com
It causes the sores in your mouth and pain swelling & fatigue .You can email me if you like i have had pain for alot of years and it took 6 to find out i had behcets.Please email me if you want to talk.I know what its like to be scared and all alone with out of control pain.I will light my candle for you and pray you feel better soon or get answers to whats causing you so much pain.
Debbie
Deb.Hopkins@frontier.com
Please call your dr. It sounds like RA is in the drivers seat and that's where u need to be. Please know that giving up is not the answer. I care and im here for support. Feel free to msg me or facebook me if you need someone to talk to....sending bunches of hugs your way!
ReplyDeleteSo many of us have been there - don't - don't despair. Reach out for assistance - preferably a Dr. you can trust. In your mind know that there is an answer and you're going to find it - believe in your own strength and all the people who have felt what you are feeling are behind you sending all the very best energy your way.
ReplyDeleteChronic pain changes your brain chemistry (hearing voices) and can cause serious depression. These are biological changes and you cannot control them by willpower. They are serious symptoms and they need to be delt with like any other lifethreating symptom, by immediately contacting your doctor or going to the ER.
ReplyDeleteMy mother in law's best friend had RA and took her life as a result of uncontrolled pain. My husband was understandably upset when I was diagnosed, so he's made a point of going to my appointments and advocating for me anytime he feels my pain has reached an unacceptable level. Do you have anyone who could do that for you? It can be SO hard to ask for more or stronger meds ourselves. Also, please consider medication for a chemical imbalance in your brain. Many antidepressants are also used to decrease pain and improve sleep.
I am praying for you. If you'd like to talk please look me up on facebook. I also have the "pain bonus pack"- RA, Migraines, Fibro, and Depression.
((hugs)) Brandy Kwan
Hold steady, Beth. The constant pain and frustration and fatigue can be just awful and overwhelming. But you're not alone. And we really do all need each other, to help cope. Keep hitting that physical/emotional snooze alarm for 5 more minutes, and then 5 more, and then 5 more. And reach out - call or email - someone to give you some support. Sending prayers of comfort, beauty, and peace to you!
ReplyDeleteBrenda
Hugs! I am not officially diagnosed yet but do I get this sucks!! The pain is a lot for me to handle right now too. Makes me want to smash something. Instead I am going to ask for pain meds and keep trying things that others in our community find works. Of course none of it may work for me. But I feel like I have to hold on to hope that something will help the pain some of the time. One day I literally wanted to smack my shoulder into the wall hard and try to break it figuring the different pain would be distracting. I didn't and the result probably would have been way worse than I anticipated. I don't know what it is that keeps me to stay in check when my temper wants to flare, but I send some of that your way (not saying I am not grumpy). And strength because we are here too. As a whole, we, the autoimmune community, stands behind you! Keep blogging, keep reaching out and be strong because the strength of our community makes us strong. You are not alone (although I know in that moment you feel alone).
ReplyDeleteHello Beth Anne, I just wanted to send you some light for the end of that dark tunnel you're in right now. I have watched my husband go through what you are going through now and with medical help we got there. I just kept calling for help because we were both helpless (and literally stuck on a chair in the dining room). I know things don't get better in an instant but he is out of that dark place now. It will happen for you too, even at 2am when you think you are all alone and it couldn't get any worse; you are not alone, please keep asking for help. Sending you a prayer, and the biggest hug. Lydia x x
ReplyDeleteHaving recently had a very painful flare up myself I know how difficult it can be, chronic pain can drive you mad and different people handle it in different ways, some better then others. I don't handle it well at all yet I'm encouraged by those who do, hope you can take some encouragement that many know what your going through and wish you well in such a painful and difficult time.
ReplyDeleteWhen I clicked on the link to your blog this morning the first thing I noticed was your happy smiling face on the right side of the blog. You are beautiful! I also noticed someone has their arm wrapped around you. Hug that person today and know that you are loved and needed in more ways than may seem possible today when the pain is trying to take over your life. You are loved. There is no doubt about it. Sending lots of prayers to you today and everyday.
ReplyDeleteI know the pain can be overwhelming and when it is call your doctor, go to the ER. You don't need to be alone right now. I sending you healing thoughts and prayers. Please let us know how you are doing.
ReplyDeletehang in there! there are better days ahead.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry you're going through this. You're not alone and I hope your emotional state does improve (as well as your physical health).
ReplyDeleteHi. I am a therapist and I also have Lupus, RA, Fibro and a whole host of other things. I know this is a challenge trying to survive with constant pain. Like almost everyone I have worked with (I work with a lot of individuals with chronic illness) there have been lots of times at 2am when I woke up in severe pain and thought, "I can't do it one more day." I'm sure everyone who has left you a note has felt this way. I know you feel alone and as if no one gets how bad this is for you - but we do. And we are here for you (even if SOME of us, uh hum, don't leave notes usually!).Please call your therapist. If you don't have a therapist ask your Rheumie for a name (I know that is the hardest part - making the first call) Or find someone that does skype therapy (so you don't have to put on make up and get dressed). Economy is tough but many of us do still take sliding fee scale. If you need help with names in your area email me and I can help you. Or...if you would consider meds, let me know and I can suggest some that you can check out with your MD/Rheumy to see if they would help. I'm so sorry...and I do know how you feel. It totally sucks. Namaste, Dr Karen (email me: drkahoving@gmail.com)
ReplyDeletei have just had a flare for about two weeks i still dont feel ok but we mustnot let it beat us and take away who we really are this page has been great for me i no im not alone and that others have the same emotoins thankyou for that im am fifty but i have had the ra for twenty years my name is carol
ReplyDeleteHi Beth
ReplyDeleteI see you stopped by my blog and I wanted to visit you. It sounds like you are having a terrible time of it. It is so awful when we are undiagnosed and the very doctors who are supposed to help us tell us nothing is wrong because their tests come back normal.
From my perception as someone who had Lyme 23 yrs before it was diagnosed properly, it sounds like it could very well be Lyme and coinfections...the terrible unrelenting pain, the anxiety, the stomach issues, etc. etc. Lyme goes into the brain and causes neurological problems.
I would say you need help to cope right now and by the comments left here, it is evident alot of people care and you are not alone.
{{{{{HUGS}}}}}
ReplyDelete“Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "I will try again tomorrow.” -- M. Radmacher
ReplyDeleteYou can do it. There is help out there and there are so many people just on the online RA community rooting for you. One day, one step at a time. Sending my love,
-- Chronic Curve.