Thursday, July 3, 2014

I haven't updated in a very long time....because, quite frankly, there has been nothing interesting to report. I'm still sick. I have days that are better than others, but I have to take my pain meds every 3-4 hours during the day or the pain is horrible. I don't like having to take pain medication and over time it becomes less effective and I have to change it or up the dosage. My goal is to be off of all meds one day. No pain meds, no antibiotics, no sleep meds...nothing. At that point, I will be one happy camper. I am still seeing Dr. S in Houston. She has been monitoring my CD 57. Due to my lyme brain, I can't remember what it was last But it has not gotten over 60 yet. My next appointment is 7/15, so we will see how that goes. I'm still feeling like a failure of a mom and wife. My husband doesn't have the wife that loves to go out anymore. I much prefer lying on the couch with my family and laughing at goofy shows. The arthritis in my left foot makes heels next to impossible to wear. I'm not as pretty as I was. I have gained weight. I want to work out, but finding the energy is next to impossible. Plus I'm having a new area of bad pain. My right shoulder. Ugh. I am pretty sure my marriage won't last if I don't get better soon. Luckily my kids are old enough to be pretty independent. I feel bad that I don't cook as much as I used to. I am going to try to work part time. I got a job as a veterinary assistant and I am thrilled. I start next week. I hope my Lyme doesn't sabotage this opportunity. If it goes okay, I might try to get certified as a vet technician. We will see. I worked as a long-term substitute from January to April this year. It was an amazing experience. As long as I was on my meds, I felt really good. I think working kept my mind of my condition, so the depression stayed under control. Let's hope my new job does the same..... Hope all of my fellow lymies are doing well.

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