Here We Go Again

I am going to call one last (I hope) rheumatologist tomorrow.  I had to stop seeing the one I've been going to because he is not on insurance and since he still hasn't diagnosed me, it's just too dang expensive.  I told him and he totally understood.  It sucks having to start over, but we have to do it.

Meanwhile, I feel like I'm dying.  I'm not kidding.  I'm sicker than I've ever been.  I'm in so much pain.  My joints in my knees, fingers, and toes hurt all the time lately.  After a nice little 2-3 month break from it, I'm once again getting the hive-like intensely itchy rash attack about every other day.  My chest is now hurting a lot of the time, as well.   Along with the pain in my chest, my resting heart rate is up around 95 a lot of the time.  I'm just not feeling well at all.  Quite frankly, I'm scared.

So I will try to find a new doctor tomorrow......me and my stupid mystery illness that shows up in none of my bloodwork.  I need Dr. House!  (don't I wish!)

Seriously, though, my gut tells me it's lupus.  My last doctor was going to test me again for it, but he never got around to it.  I don't know what to think or do anymore.  All I DO know is that I am getting sicker.  I need help and I pray that I can find a doctor who can figure this out.

I've been reading blogs every night, but just haven't felt like writing (or even commenting).  I decided that I probably need to write 1~for therapeutic reasons...it always feels good to vent this way!  and 2~to keep a journal/record of my symptoms...my memory sucks these days.

Hope you all are doing better than I am.